We hope you like them as much as we did - Enjoy!
And if you have a good one too – send it along. If we add it to the list, we'll send you $25!
- "My cat ate the invoice and it got her all plugged up. I'm on my way to the vet right now." (Anonymous)
- “I called a customer to find out payment status for a balance that rolled past due. She told me that she couldn’t see to write the check because she accidentally grabbed nail glue from her purse instead of eye drops and glued her eyes shut.” (Submitted by Nikki Keahey, Credit Manager, Ferguson Enterprises, Inc.)
- “I don’t have enough money to fix my Maserati, how can I pay you?” (Submitted by Mike Bengert, Director of Credit & Collections, Atlas World Group)
- Collector "What is the reason for non-payment?” Debtor “Last month I lost money gambling, now I have to save money for a Carnival Cruise, It was a great deal!” (Submitted by Kevin Koehler, Credit Manager at PPG Industries, Pittsburgh, PA)
- Customer came in my office today, a current account. He gave me some chocolate coins since I am always wanting money. (Submitted by Sandi Barlow of ABC Supply)
- Our customer with 30 Days Terms was 60 days past due for $4,000. After several calls and a request for check information, the customer replied, “I am sending appetizer of $2,091. The entrée will follow next week.” My reply was, “You must pay for the entrée before you can order dessert!” (Submitted by Jane N. Williams of Peirce-Phelps, Inc.)
- "I just got off the phone to find out why a company only paid part of our invoice. The lady said “I paid what the invoice shows.” I asked her to look at the bottom right hand corner of the invoice and she put me on hold for a minute and came back with, “Well it was folded so I didn’t see all the other charges!" (Submitted by Chris Finch, Sumitomo Electric, Research Triangle Park, NC)
- We have a customer that has paid prompt to 30 slow; he has recently rolled into our 60 day column. We then called and had to leave a message. Of course we kept trying to contact the customer but in the meantime the account then rolled into the Over 90 day column. Customer finally called in and left a message, "Why do you have these columns if we are not allowed to use them?" (Submitted by April Prebys, Controller/Credit Mgr. of Ferguson, a Wolseley Co.)
- While visiting a customer in New York City, I was told that our payment was not mailed because the elevator was out and mailmen do not have to go above the second floor if the elevator is out. Their office was on the 3rd floor! (Submitted by Sam Smith at Crescent Electric Supply)
- "Customer was unable to pick-up a repaired backhoe as he spent over $35,000 for his recent wedding, which included having the bride-to-be arrive in a rented helicopter" (Submitted by Charles Rushanan of Stephenson Equipment)
Send us your best excuse, and if we add it to the list, we'll send you $25!